Jun 30: Recording of "please listen carefully" extended vehicle warranty scam

Man's voice: "Please listen carefully. This is an important notice regarding your automobile. We recently mailed you a postcard to activate your extended warranty coverage. This courtesy call is your final notice that your vehicle will be removed from our system. This means the opportunity to activate your extended warranty coverage at deeply discounted rates will be lost. To speak with an agent regarding your options before the deadline, please press one now. If you wish to permanently remove your vehicle from eligibility for future coverage, press three now."

Jun 28: Recording of "please listen carefully" extended vehicle warranty scam

Woman's voice: "Please listen carefully to this important notice regarding your automobile. We recently mailed you a postcard to activate your extended warranty coverage. This courtesy call is your final notice that your vehicle will be reclassified and removed from our system, meaning the opportunity to activate your extended warranty coverage at a deeply discounted rate will be lost. To speak with an agent regarding your options before the deadline, please press one now. If you wish to permanently remove your vehicle from eligibility for future coverage, press three now."

Jun 27: Recording of "this is an important message" automotive warranty scam

Woman's voice: "This is an important message regarding your automotive warranty. We have made several attempts to reach you. This is your final courtesy call before your vehicle is reclassified. Press one to speak to a warranty specialist. Or press two and your file will be automatically closed."

Jun 26: Recording of scam from "Heather" at "account services" or "credit services"

"Hello. This is Heather at account services. And we're calling in reference to your current credit card account. There's no problems currently with your account. It is urgent however that you contact us concerning your eligibility for lowering your interest rate. To as little as six point nine percent. Your eligibility expires shortly. So please consider this your final notice. Please press one now on your phone to speak with a live operator and lower your interest rate. Or press two to discontinue further notices. Thank you and have a great day."

I pressed one. The guy said they were "Credit Services". The guy said to qualify, I needed at least three thousand dollars in credit card debt, at least nine point nine percent interest rate, and have good standing with one card. I asked for the address and phone number of the corporate headquarters, if there is one, of "Credit Services". He wouldn't tell me and said I had to be qualified in order to learn that information. I told him that I didn't want to deal with them if they are a scam, so I need to know who they are. He still refused to tell me, and said that I had to be a customer to be able to get that information. He also said they sent me mail, from "Credit Services", and that they were making a "courtesy call" because there was no response to that. I think that was a lie, but I didn't say that. I certainly don't recall getting any junk mail from "Credit Services", but if I do, I'll make note of the return address.

He also said they weren't a scam before refusing again to tell me what the address and phone number of their corporate headquarters are, but he gave me no reason to stop believing that they are a scam.

Jun 25: Recording of "annoying commercials" from "Dave" with an "authorized Dish Network dealer"

"Hi. This is Dave calling with an authorized Dish Network dealer in your area. I'll get right to the point. If you feel like you've been paying too much every month, and getting very little for your cable TV, I have a great deal for you. We will give you free satellite TV equipment and installation for up to four rooms with the lowest and best monthly price in the country. Sign up today and we'll also give you a free two room DVR system, which will allow you to skip those annoying commercials and never miss your favorite TV show again. Lower prices, better channels, and better service for you and your family. Press one to hear more."

Jun 25: Recording of "this is the second notice" vehicle warranty scam

Woman's voice: "This is the second notice that the factory warranty on your vehicle may have expired, and should be reactivated to protect you against the cost of repairs. If you have not responded to this notification, it's not too late. Please don't make the mistake of driving without a warranty. You are still eligible to reactivate warranty coverage. This is the final call before we close the file. Press two to be removed from the follow-up list. Or press one to speak with a representative now about your vehicle."

Their file must be constantly getting closed unless that "final call before we close the file" statement is a lie.

Jun 25: Recording of "Michael" telemarketing for Dish

"Hi. This is Michael. Calling in regards to Dish, the satellite TV company. Over the next few weeks, we're in your area installing a number of systems. And have a promotion that will get families a new satellite TV system totally free. That's right. Free installation. Free equipment for up to four rooms. And a free DVR. And if you don't know what that is, press one and our reps will tell you about it. Basically, if you still have a cable provider for your television, we want your business, and we're going to great lengths to get it. Today, we'll even give you a hundred bucks back. So with no obligation, press one and be connected to a customer service representative. It doesn't hurt to at least talk to us and learn more. I'm confident that we can save you money and improve the way you watch TV. Give us a chance. Press one now. Press one and be connected to a customer service representative. Press one now."

Screw off. Those "great lengths" are just annoying.

Jun 25: Bizarre recording of "important information about your credit card account" scam

Woman's voice: "This is important information about your credit card account. This is your second and final notice to reduce your current credit card interest rate to as little as six point nine percent. As you should have received mail. Press one now to speak to our friendly customer service representative. The only requirement is that you must have at least four thousand dollars in total credit card debt between all your credit card accounts, and have one of them in good standing. Press one to speak to a live representative. Press"
Spliced in voice: "hair"
Woman's voice: "to be removed from this special list."

It doesn't even make any sense. "As you should have received mail"? Press "hair"?

Perhaps this is some prank. "friendly customer service representative"? "special list"?

Jun 23: Recording of credit scam harassment, probably "Rachel" at "cardholder services"

Woman's voice: "...current credit card account. There are no problems currently with your account. However it is urgent that you contact us concerning your eligibility for lowering your interest rate. Your eligibility expires shortly, so please consider this your final notice. Please press one on your phone now to speak with a live oper--"
Second woman's voice: "I'm sorry, that was an invalid response."
First woman's voice: "Please press one on your phone now to speak with a live oper--"
Second woman's voice: "I'm sorry, that was an invalid response."
First woman's voice: "Please press one on your phone now to speak with a live oper--"
Second woman's voice: "I'm sorry, that was an invalid response."
First woman's voice: "Please press one on your phone now to speak with a live oper--"

The recording must have started spewing before the answering machine started recording, so the first part was not available. It seems like this is just harassment of phone numbers on their shit list.

Jun 23: Recording of "Kelly" at "credit card services" scam

"Hi. This is Kelly at credit card services. I'm calling with an important announcement about your credit card account. This is our third attempt at reaching you. Our records indicate that you have been overpaying interest. Right now, we have you qualified to reduce your interest payment. To as low as two point nine percent. And cut your monthly payments in half. If you want to cut your monthly payment, lower your interest rate, and consolidate to one monthly payment, press one now. Again, this is your final chance to participate. So press one now. Or press three to be removed."

This is the fifth time this month and twenty-fourth time since last November that these fuckers have called with this bullshit.

Jun 20: Recording of "Sean" from "nationwide debt relief" scam

"Hello this is Sean calling back from nationwide debt relief regarding my previous message. If your credit card debt, personal loans, or collection accounts are still a burden, our team of non-profit agencies will work with your creditors to consolidate your debts, help lower your monthly payments, and reduce or completely eliminate interest rates and costly credit card fees. There is a way out. Call us today for a free, no-obligation debt analysis at 866-480-5213. Again, our toll-free number is 866-480-5213. Press one to repeat this message. Press two to leave a voice message. Or press nine to be removed from our calling list."

Jun 20: Recording of "Kelly" at "credit card services" scam

"Hi. This is Kelly at credit card services. I'm calling with an important announcement about your credit card account. This is our third attempt at reaching you. Our records indicate that you have been overpaying interest. Right now, we have you qualified to reduce your interest payment. To as low as two point nine percent. And cut your monthly payments in half. If you want to cut your monthly payment, lower your interest rate, and consolidate to one monthly payment, press one now. Again, this is your final chance to participate. So press one now. Or press three to be removed."

Repeating those lies many times, many more than three times, still makes them lies. I guess my phone number being in their "records", i.e. sucker list, indicates that I've been "overpaying interest".

Jun 19: "Jen" with satellite TV scam

"Hi. This is Jen calling to set up delivery and installation of your new digital home satellite TV system. Because we're doing installations in your neighborhood right now, you can get free installation and a four room digital satellite TV system for free. This system also includes free DVR receivers. You know, like tivo? Which is awesome. To learn more, press one on your phone right now. This is by far the best deal, saving you on average over four hundred dollars per year compared to cable rates. Once again, to learn more and to be connected to one of our agents, press one on your phone right now."

Jun 19: Recording of no money down brand-name computer scam

Man's voice: "Congratulations. You've been prequalified for a brand-name computer with no money down or credit check. You can even get a free printer and free LCD TV with your order. Press one now to take advantage of this exciting offer. Again, press one now. Or press three to decline this offer."

Jun 18: Recording of "Jeff" with "the travel center" scam

"Hi. This is Jeff with the travel center. You have been selected to receive a complimentary seven night Mexican Riviera cruise for two adults. Or. Two round-trip airline tickets to any destination in the continental U.S. or Hawaii. No purchase necessary. Your confirmation number is SPR480. Our toll-free number is 1-888-325-5355. Thanks."

Jun 17: Recording of "Michael" telemarketing for Dish, the satellite TV company

"Hi. This is Michael. Calling in regards to Dish, the satellite TV company. Over the next few weeks, we're in your area installing a number of systems. And have a promotion that will get families a new satellite TV system totally free. That's right. Free installation. Free equipment for up to four rooms. And a free DVR. And if you don't know what that is, press one and our reps will tell you about it. Basically, if you still have a cable provider for your television, we want your business, and we're going to great lengths to get it. Today, we'll even give you a hundred bucks back. So with no obligation, press one and be connected to a customer service representative. It doesn't hurt to at least talk to us and learn more. I'm confident that we can save you money and improve the way you watch TV. Give us a chance. Press one now. Press one and be connected to a customer service representative. Press one now."

Jun 17: Recording of no money down brand-name computer scam

Man's voice: "Congratulations. You've been prequalified for a brand-name computer with no money down or credit check. You can even get a free printer and free LCD TV with your order. Press one now to take advantage of this exciting offer. Again, press one now. Or press three to decline this offer."

These fuckers are recalling numbers less than 5 days after the last time? Fucking jerks. Or maybe the last guy just put my number on their shit list.

Jun 14: Recording of extended vehicle warranty scam

Woman's voice: "Hello, this is a courtesy care notice to inform you that the vehicle that you are driving will soon meet the deadline to extend the warranty coverage that protects you against costly repair bills. Our warranty specialists are standing by and will take just a few minutes to quote you coverage and give you the peace of mind you deserve. Time is running out, so press one now to be transferred to the next warranty specialist. Remember to ask about our employee pricing discounts and interest-free financing. If you have already extended coverage since this notice, or would like to have your name removed from this offer, press nine now."

Jun 13: Recording of "this is the second notice" vehicle warranty scam

Woman's voice: "This is the second notice that the factory warranty on your vehicle may have expired, and should be reactivated to protect you against the cost of repairs. If you have not responded to this notification, it's not too late. Please don't make the mistake of driving without a warranty. You are still eligible to reactivate warranty coverage. This is the final call before we close the file. Press two to be removed from the follow-up list. Or press one to speak with a representative now about your vehicle."

This recording last called just 3 days ago. So the "this is the final call before we close the file" must mean the file was closed in the last 3 days. Or, more likely, it's just another lie in another scam.

Jun 12: Recording of no money down brand-name computer scam

Man's voice: "Congratulations. You've been prequalified for a brand-name computer with no money down or credit check. You can even get a free printer and free LCD TV with your order. Press one now to take advantage of this exciting offer. Again, press one now. Or press three to decline this offer."

So these fuckers have both my home phone and work phone and called both on the same day.

Jun 12: Recording of "Bill Bennett" from the "Las Vegas Vacation Authority" scam

"Hi. This is Bill Bennett from the Las Vegas Vacation Authority. I have a free Las Vegas vacation for couples waiting for you. Press one now for details and I'll throw in two free show tickets with your complimentary vacation. Go ahead. Press one now for your free Vegas vacation."

Jun 12: Recording of "Jessica" with some credit scam

"Hi. This is Jessica calling in reference to your current credit card account. This is your final notice for lowering your interest rate. Press one on your phone now to reduce your rate and take advantage of this offer. Again, press one now and speak with a live agent. Or press two and discontinue further notices. Thank you and have a great day."

More "this is final notice" bullshit from this scam with yet another new voice.

Jun 12: Recording of no money down brand-name computer scam

Man's voice: "Congratulations. You've been prequalified for a brand-name computer with no money down or credit check. You can even get a free printer and free LCD TV with your order. Press one now to take advantage of this exciting offer. Again, press one now. Or press three to decline this offer."

So I pressed 1 right after "free printer". Then I chewed up a few minutes of the call center guy's time demanding the free printer.

brand-name = Dell

The call center guy identified himself as from "the computer center", whatever that is, when he got on the line. Why didn't they identify themselves in the recording?

Jun 10: Recording of "please listen carefully" extended vehicle warranty scam

Man's voice: "Please listen carefully. This is an important notice regarding your automobile. We recently mailed you a postcard to activate your extended warranty coverage. This courtesy call is your final notice that your vehicle will be removed from our system. This means the opportunity to activate your extended warranty coverage at deeply discounted rates will be lost. To speak with an agent regarding your options before the deadline, please press one now. If you wish to permanently remove your vehicle from eligibility for future coverage, press three now."

Jun 10: Recording of "Kelly" at "credit card services" scam

"Hi. This is Kelly at credit card services. I'm calling with an important announcement about your credit card account. This is our third attempt at reaching you. Our records indicate that you have been overpaying interest. Right now, we have you qualified to reduce your interest payment. To as low as two point nine percent. And cut your monthly payments in half. If you want to cut your monthly payment, lower your interest rate, and consolidate to one monthly payment, press one now. Again, this is your final chance to participate. So press one now. Or press three to be removed."

Jun 10: Recording of "this announcement concerns your eligibility" "economic stimulus homeowners refinance mortgage program" scam

Woman's voice: "This announcement concerns your eligibility for the government's economic stimulus homeowners refinance mortgage program. This program will help homeowners refinance their current mortgage, and save hundreds of dollars each month by lowering their present interest rate. These government home loans are federally insured, so they are regulated, which means they cost less than traditional home loans. And help those homeowners that need to refinance and get out of an adjustable and into a thirty year fixed."

Man's voice: "Please note. This is a temporary program and is only available until the end of two thousand eight. So press one now to find out if you are eligible for the government's economic stimulus homeowners refinance mortgage program. Press three if you wish to be removed from our marketing list."

Jun 10: Recording of "Jeff" with "the travel center" scam

"Hi. This is Jeff with the travel center. You've been selected to receive a complimentary seven night Mexican Riviera cruise for two adults. Or. Airfare and hotel to either Las Vegas, Cancun, or Puerto Vallarta. No purchase necessary. Your confirmation number is SPR480. Our toll-free number is 1-888-325-5355. Thanks."

Jun 10: Recording of "this is the second notice" vehicle warranty scam

Woman's voice: "This is the second notice that the factory warranty on your vehicle may have expired, and should be reactivated to protect you against the cost of repairs. If you have not responded to this notification, it's not too late. Please don't make the mistake of driving without a warranty. You are still eligible to reactivate warranty coverage. This is the final call before we close the file. Press two to be removed from the follow-up list. Or press one to speak with a representative now about your vehicle."

This is full of lies and deception: "second notice", "final call". They don't identify themselves, so it must be a scam. What is this "may have expired" weasel wording? The previous wording of "has expired" was too obviously a lie?

What does "close the file" mean? That their robocaller will have a new recording with minor changes in wording the next time around?

Jun 10: Recording of extended vehicle warranty scam

Woman's voice: "Hello, this is a courtesy care notice to inform you that the vehicle that you are driving will soon meet the deadline to extend the warranty coverage that protects you against costly repair bills. Our warranty specialists are standing by and will take just a few minutes to quote you coverage and give you the peace of mind you deserve. Time is running out, so press one now to be transferred to the next warranty specialist. Remember to ask about our employee pricing discounts and interest-free financing. If you have already extended coverage since this notice, or would like to have your name removed from this offer, press nine now."

Jun 7: Recording of "annoying commercials" from "Dave" with an "authorized Dish Network dealer"

"Hi. This is Dave calling with an authorized Dish Network dealer in your area. I'll get right to the point. If you feel like you've been paying too much every month, and getting very little for your cable TV, I have a great deal for you. We will give you free satellite TV equipment and installation for up to four rooms with the lowest and best monthly price in the country. Sign up today and we'll also give you a free two room DVR system, which will allow you to skip those annoying commercials and never miss your favorite TV show again. Lower prices, better channels, and better service for you and your family. Press one to hear more."

At least this time it hung up instead of repeating itself over and over.

Jun 7: Recording of "Michael" telemarketing for Dish, the satellite TV company

"Hi. This is Michael. Calling in regards to Dish, the satellite TV company. Over the next few weeks, we're in your area installing a number of systems. And have a promotion that will get families a new satellite TV system totally free. That's right. Free installation. Free equipment for up to four rooms. And a free DVR. And if you don't know what that is, press one and our reps will tell you about it. Basically, if you still have a cable provider for your television, we want your business, and we're going to great lengths to get it. Today, we'll even give you a hundred bucks back. So with no obligation, press one and be connected to a customer service representative. It doesn't hurt to at least talk to us and learn more. I'm confident that we can save you money and improve the way you watch TV. Give us a chance. Press one now. Press one and be connected to a customer service representative. Press one now."

Jun 6: Recording of "don't be alarmed" scam

Woman's voice: "Don't be alarmed. But this is your final notice for lower interest rates on your current account. This offer expires today. Press one and speak to your account manager to reduce your rate. Again, press one now. This is the last offer of the season. Or press two to discontinue further notices. Thank you and have a great day."

"this is your final notice" and "press two to discontinue further notices"? There's some disconnect there. But then again, this is a scam.

Jun 6: Recording of scam from the "advocacy for manageable health care"

"This is a public service message from the advocacy for manageable health care. We have found a health care program for less than one hundred dollars per month. To receive this important information for you and your family, please press one now. Again, to receive this important information about a health care program for less than three dollars per day, including doctor visits and a prescription discount card, press the number one on your telephone now. Or if you'd like to be removed from our call list, press two. Thank you and have a great day."

Jun 6: Recording of "Kelly" at "credit card services" scam

"Hi. This is Kelly at credit card services. I'm calling with an important announcement about your credit card account. This is our third attempt at reaching you. Our records indicate that you have been overpaying interest. Right now, we have you qualified to reduce your interest payment. To as low as two point nine percent. And cut your monthly payments in half. If you want to cut your monthly payment, lower your interest rate, and consolidate to one monthly payment, press one now. Again, this is your final chance to participate. So press one now. Or press three to be removed."

Jun 5: Recording "Kelly" at "credit card services" scam

"Hi. This is Kelly at credit card services. I'm calling with an important announcement about your credit card account. This is our third attempt at reaching you. Our records indicate that you have been overpaying interest. Right now, we have you qualified to reduce your interest payment. To as low as two point nine percent. And cut your monthly payments in half. If you want to cut your monthly payment, lower your interest rate, and consolidate to one monthly payment, press one now. Again, this is your final chance to participate. So press one now. Or press three to be removed."

Jun 2: Recording of "Jeff" with "the travel center" scam

"Hi. This is Jeff with the travel center. You've been selected to receive a complimentary seven night Mexican Riviera cruise for two adults. Or. Airfare and hotel to either Las Vegas, Cancun, or Puerto Vallarta. No purchase necessary. Your confirmation number is SPR480. Our toll-free number is 1-888-325-5355. Thanks."