May 26: Recording of Michael at your local satellite television office

This recording has called May 26.

"Hello. This is Michael at your local satellite television office. We're running a special promotion for new subscribers right now and we THOUGHT you'd want to know about it. With digital satellite TV you get MORE channels for LESS money with DVD quality picture and CD quality surround sound. Our digital video recorders automatically record every episode of your favorite shows and movies with up to one hundred hours of recording time and EVEN lets you skip the commercial. Right now, you can get up to four rooms installed for FREE with NO equipment to buy and HUNDREDS of channels to choose from for less than $35 a month. We'll even give you free digital video recorders for two of those rooms. This special offer is for a LIMITED time only so to speak to one of our friendly representatives and get more information, press one now. Again, to speak to one our friendly representatives, press one now. Or if you'd like to be removed from our list, press nine now."

"EVEN lets you skip the commercial." Such irony. "LIMITED time" is meaningless. There have been other equally inane telemarketing messages from this or other satellite television companies for years, and, no doubt, for years to come.